Thursday, April 12, 2012

My To-Do List Vs. Reality


Thing I should be doing:
Updating Deddrie.com



What this entails:
Drawing a freaking comic, scanning it, posting it.  It's not that complicated.

Thing I say to myself:
"Is it really that hard to do a stab joke?  Deddrie can be crude and stupid.  That's why he's so great.  This doesn't have to be so thought out!  We have FANS that are waiting!"

My insane rationale for not doing it:

"But... I have these that are too big to scan and I'm waiting to do that so I can edit and... and...  and...  ..."  There is no viable rationale. 


Thing I should be doing:

Homework.



What this entails:
Reading stuff I find interesting, writing brief responses, and drawing a bit.  You know, that thing I love doing anyway.

My insane rationale for not doing it:

I'm not sure exactly what I should do, and I want to impress this class.

...So I do... nothing?  Kay.  What?


Thing I should be doing:
Going over Moth again and publishing the damn thing.



What I'm doing instead:
Occasionally writing bits of things that could go into other things and then forgetting what notebook it was in or just scrapping it... 
OR starting an entirely new story with the characters. 


Thing I should be doing:
Planning out the comic of Mr. No and doing another page of Donna.
Mr. No animation






Reason I should be doing these things:
They'll actually be publishable and I could move on with my damn life.  I mean, look at them.  Interesting shit, right?

Reason I'm not doing this:
I... don't know.  Fear of screwing it up?  No idea.  Donna, at least, it's a matter of finding someone to do color and backgrounds, but also a matter of having the money to pay someone to do said color and backgrounds.  ...It's a bit of a vicious cycle.



Thing I WANT to do:
Play Alice: Madness Returns



Legitimate reason I want to:
I played the first game over and over on the computer.  As an enormous fan of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and everything even mildly related to it, I loved this game.  I loved the Psychological elements and the character designs and... everything.  LOVE.  So, I bought the sequel as soon as I could.

Insane reason I'm not doing it:
I have trouble with point with one, look with other controls and I'm too stubborn to learn in order to play a game I waited over a decade to play.  My real reason?  Imagined embarrassment. 

I'm so frustrated by these types of controls (based on when I was, like, thirteen or something) that everyone else is awesome at, that I'm actually afraid to even try, thinking I will look stupid.  Mind you, I can play when I'm ALONE IN THE HOUSE, but I'm still assuming someone will come in and see me failing and be like "Wow.  Noob" even though no one cares how I play MY damn game.  The roommates in my head are drastically worse than any of my actual friends in real life.  I know this.  So, I keep myself from playing a game, and instead watch videos and cry about how no one will play the game for me, so I can just watch it... Knowing I'll be frustrated when they aren't doing what I would do. 

I know this is stupid. 


Thing I should be doing:
Doing a better post.


Reason I'm not:
Honestly, it's like a baby depression. 

I have so many things I want and should do, that I'm just overwhelmed and not doing anything. 

Because of a lack of comments, even though people post on other things about it, I don't believe anyone is reading this.

Also, I'm hyped up on Benadryl because a fish bone is ruining my life.  ...I'm sure I'll do a post about that eventually.



Thing I'm doing instead:

"Stupid games on internet" is what that says.  I'm not rescanning.  Nope.  Not gonna.






In other news:



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