Saturday, April 11, 2015

How My Invisible Dog Got Run Over




I grew up around a lot of animals, though most of them either scared me on some level, were technically my sister's pets, or both.


Still, I had access to A LOT of living creatures, so I'm not really sure why I opted for the invisible dog…


But I did.

When I say that I had an invisible dog, I don't mean that I just had a super tiny animal, or that it was completely imaginary.



Well…

Kind of?

I had gotten a leash from a joke store that was effectively a metal rod made up to look like there was an invisible dog on the end with the collar.


This was great because it allowed me to walk around outside like a normal child, but without being dragged along by a dog that was significantly stronger than I was.


Any other time I chose to walk outside, it was Summer, and I was very much against the wearing of shoes.


I'm not even sure what I named this particular thing, but it was probably Bob or Sara. 
I say this because I'm fairly certain it was during that time in my life where I named everything Bob or Sara.
I'm even marrying a Bob. 
What the Hell?


I also seem to remember this actually being my second invisible dog.

I'm not sure what happened to the first one…

Maybe it had a similar fate?

In which case, where the Hell were my parents???

Either way, what happened next hurt me in a way that made me question my sanity, even as a little kid.



I remember having no choice but to imagine gushing blood.


See...

My invisible dog got hit by a car.

No

Seriously


This happened.

And I responded like an actual pet had been injured.
I feel like this particular incident is not a common thing for other were-once-children.

I did my best to bend it back to the normal, healthy-invisible state, but it was no use.


In retrospect, I probably just didn't have the right tools for the job, and it probably didn't occur to me to ask MY PARENTS for assistance. 

Anyway, that's the story. 
I'm sure there's more to it, but I can't imagine any other riveting tales of my invisible dog would be entertaining. 

I also realize that I titled this post "How My Invisible Dog Got Run Over" but I truly have no memory of the HOW. 

I know it happened. 

I remember being very upset after previously being very happy with my "pet"…

That's it.

I leave you with the knowledge that I drew most of these illustrations while in the bathroom at work during break.



Just letting you know.

…Full disclosure and all that.